Healthful Development
When the child tries to contribute for the necessities of the family, being arranged the bed, making candies (clearly in accordance with its age and capacity) and is recognized for the mother, praised, feels-and composing ' ' quadro' ' familiar, necessary as person and member of this home. If this does not find ' ' espao' ' for ' ' ser' ' , it can grow needing to destroy what one became, meaningless, what not it of ' ' frutos' '. At the beginning, when baby, the simple smile of the mother makes with that if he feels accepted, existing, therefore still the symbiosis is present mother-baby. With elapsing of the time, she is necessary to be taken the serious one for somebody. If its ' ' produes' ' they are ignored, jede, makes with that it occurs a sensation of impotence and uselessness, what will be able to unchain with the time, an explosion of aggression and destruction. This phase is long, and important for the construction of a fortified identity. We can find signals of concern and guilt in very small children, but of one it forms consistent and openly observvel for the adults, Around more or less five years of age. When the child already if v' ' separada' ' of the mother, the father enters in scene, not as one clone of the figure materna, but as somebody that can be um' ' libertador' ' , in the measure where it is a strong figure; he will protect that it, hindering that any badly happens.
If the familiar environment cannot offer to this support due the absence of the father, Depression of the mother, for example, this will have that to adopt an auto precocious control of the impulses, before being in conditions to make it. In these cases the inhibition of the impulse is a permanent fear of that some destructive aspect runs away its control. The constant fight enters the good and the evil, stopped for the human being if it aggravates in these situations, therefore the individual with passing of the time, moves away itself exactly from itself. They are long years of therapy for ' ' to make the way in return ' ' , therefore until then, it served only of sustentation for a problematic familiar dynamics. When the environment is adjusted, propitiating sustentation to the infantile development, the construction of the identity becomes natural, ' ' normal' '. During all our life, we will be in fight with internal conflicts, in more or less overwhelming way, depending on our familiar origins. Therefore when deciding to be parents, we must be well conscientious of ' ' espao' ' affective to be opened for the inclusion of a new member in the family!
